Oxlade Chamberlain IS our Gareth Bale
But the opposite.
BOTH from Southampton
BOTH joined north London teams
BOTH HAVE SHLIDS
BUT one joined the red one and the other the white one.
One looks like a monkey, the other like a turtle.
One was a shite FB, one is a shite winger.
Ones shlid is to hide the fact that he is going bald, the others is to show how thick his hair really is.
Luke SkywOXer has been created to restore the balance to the force of wingers/fullbacks that Garth Vader disturbed when he killed MAICon Windu.
He will be helped by Obi Weng Kenobi.
Behold the prophecy.